Project: Self-check

Project: Self-check

Hey, it's Lily!
I know this adulting thing is so tiring, either you are working part-time or full-time, side hustle or hobbies to catch up on. What else is there? Bills! Bills after bills. Plus, we're still in the middle of a pandemic, and now it is even harder for everyone. But, these days, I can't help but wander in thoughts, "how am I going to help myself in keeping my sanity in this crazy world we live in?" To that, I'd like to ask few questions;

How challenging is getting out of bed every morning for you? How often do you clean your room? How do you make time for a work-out sesh?

Some might answer, "It's basic!" or "Nah, I don't have time to work out." or "You guys clean your room?!" (Yes, dear, we do.) It is challenging, isn't it? Especially if you are in a WFH set-up, but at the same time, isn't it a lot reasonable to have time for these things since we're WFH? Well, maybe not everyone, but what if we are just procrastinating? See how I'm overthinking? *laughs*

These past few months, I've been working on an unconscious project which leads to this whole blogging thing, and I decided to call it "Project; Self-check." In this project, I focused more on my perspective, attitude, response, and mindset. Because I caught myself just trying to survive my day and not live, which made me kind of feel sad. So, I started to do this little by little, and here's how;

• Making bed diligently every morning.
• Keeping my room clean.
• Finishing my task in a day.
• Drinking more water.
• Squeezing a short work-out when I can, and
• Reading or writing to end my day.

My goal is to be consistent in what I do, holding my discipline, to keep my motivation. These things, I would say, indeed helped me have a better day. With this Self-check project, I feel like I am always looking at the mirror, staring at my nature, imperfect. Realizing that I am indeed a work in progress. Like an art slowly progressing, filled with every stroke of a gentle hand. Like a lump of clay being formed into a vase, pressed to shape. Like a season in a year, constantly changing. (oh, how poetic)

Those small things I do for myself made me conscious of how things affect me mentally and emotionally. I discovered how I responded to every situation, which is like I'm writing a reflection paper. (now this blog is my reflection paper) This self-check project also helped me admits where I am wrong, accepted that today's best isn't the same as yesterday, to be more gentle with my own progress. To be honest, it made me love reviewing my own mistakes and working on them, and you know what? I didn't do it all alone. I was with God. Because how else can I change my own weakness? How else can I be so aware of my own action if not without the Lord's guidance? Not possible with me, but with God.

To that, I'd like to end this blog with a quote from the song "Transfiguration" by Hillsong Worship.

"I am changed, changing still."

If you want to listen, here's a link:

Spotify
https://open.spotify.com/track/5XKPxXuDDkCqatONHZw39X?si=5e3b179709c347f6

YouTube
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HLMtfq5epbw